Abyssal Pain
by Fiery-razing-phoenix
Summary: When you can't hold the one you love... What does that do to you? What must it be like? Guy x Natalia


Disclaimer: I do not own Tales of the Abyss nor do I own any of the characters (though I wish I did). This fanfiction is not intended to be used for profit or gain in any way. (Yay now that that's over read my fic!)

"How long has it been?" wondered Guy, "How long since I've felt such strong emotions. Pain and happiness. Utter sadness and complete bliss." It was dusk he had wandered off to the forest nearby the campsite. For a long time now, Guy had been painfully aware of his feelings for a certain Kimlascan princess. She had made her love for him clear as well. He couldn't doubt her honesty as she had told him how she felt. "But, how can she feel so strongly knowing…knowing that I'm too cowardly to even be able to hold her hand?" Suddenly, while he was deep in his thoughts, he became aware of someone behind him as a twig snapped.

"Guy, you don't have to be afraid of me." Natalia looked sincere, determined to make sure that the man she loved knew her meaning. Even though he returned the same feelings, he could not show them.

"Natalia, I'm so sorry. I want hold you. I want to kiss you. I want you to know that. But, I just can't…I just can't get over my past. It's not that I'm scared of you. I just…I…" The Malkuth nobility lowered his head and tried not to let his tears show. Ever since his childhood, Guy had been unable to come into contact with women. That hadn't been a problem for a long time. He had had no problems with showing his fear of women to the maids at Fabre manor who he didn't have feelings for. But, for Natalia, things were different. He loved her. Not just her beautiful form. No, that wasn't even scratching the surface. He was attracted to her body and soul.

"I won't let you continue to hurt yourself with the ghosts of your past. If you love me, you love me. I can grasp that you are unable to be physically close to me. I understand that so I don't see why you won't accept that that is good enough for me? Until you can be close to me, I can accept the love you give to me without a kiss, without a hug. I love you for that." The Kimlascan princess was hurting too. She loved Guy and as long as he believed it was his fault she was unhappy she could not be happy with herself. Their bond together had been forged by battle and by sacrifice.

Natalia could remember only too clearly the time when she hadn't been focused well enough in a battle and an oracle soldier rushed her as she was getting ready to launch s powerful arrow at his spellcasting companion. As the blade was about to sink into her delicate arm, Guy came running to knock the soldier out of her way. However, in the fall he tumbled onto the incapacitated soldiers sword leaving a large gash in his side. Natalia had been so upset, she couldn't heal it herself and Tear had to do the best she could. She had to repay him. As far as she knew, he was still suffering from that wound. And from a deeper, more permanent one as well.

"Guy, do you trust me?" Natalia inquired.

"Of course, why?" came the reply

"Close your eyes." Natalia requested. Guy immediately obeyed. Natalia hoped that by doing this, she wasn't hurting him but, setting him free. Natalia observed Guy for awhile admiring his calmness despite the situation. Surely he knew she would try to make contact with him. Why was he so peaceful? Natalia didn't care nor did she hesitate a moment longer. She rushed in and embraced her friend, no, he was much more than that. Guy's reaction was automatic. As Natalia's arms wrapped around him, he followed suit. Amazed at his own courage, he continued, with trembling hands to find the back of his princess' head and then, directing her eyes upward to his, he kissed her. Not a forced kiss but one of love, one of unending deep affection. As the two finally ended their kiss, Guy said, "You don't know how long I've wanted to do that." A brilliant glow in his eyes, Natalia knew what she had done was right.

"I just wanted to repay you. I love you and I can't stand to see you in pain. You put yourself in harm's way to protect me. I decided that if I showed you my love, my true love for you, then you would be able to do the same. Up until now though, I hadn't been able to."

"I promise you, I'll honor that love. I won't ever allow myself to use the crutch of my past to give myself an excuse to escape my future. Besides, I don't want to escape my future." Guy stated intently

"The future is a frightening thought." Natalia wondered aloud

"Not my future. _You _are my future."


End file.
